Shangers & Mash (or Hom less in Shanghai)

Before I reached Shanghai, I had great aspirations. I was going to meet Mat and we were going to have a weekend on ze town. Due to circumstances in his control, he wiped me (joke). Anyway, this left me with the dilemma of being mentally and enthusiastically prepared for a 'big' weekend but if I couldn't find the people to reciprocate then it would be a disaster. I was even contemplating cutting my time short as I'd heard mixed reports.

Fortunately, I can now report that it was a success. I checked into the groovy Captain's hotel/hostel were backpackers and business people mingle in amongst a sea shanty theme (they love themes). It has a bar which faces onto the business side of the river's skyline. It's all neon and flashing lights. All the skyscrapers are hovering around being the tallest in the world. That seems to be aim. One hotel has the highest everything in the world - bar, nightclub and pool. I made it to the bar on the 87th floor.

Navigation in Shanghai, well China, is like nothing else. Street names change on the same street for no apparent reason and all the taxi drivers are illiterate (better find a computer soon that has a spell check before I paste this one) as they've come from the villages to make their fortunes.

The guide books have everything written in Pinyin (a way of writing Chinese by using the Roman alphabet). Nobody seems to use or understand this. The Shanghai tourism board (who I will be writing too) released a series of glossy pamphlets with things to do, entirely in English. On my first night out, I was carrying around their guide to Shanghai bars. It listed over 70 with arrows pointing to a map of the city. This was about as useful to a Shanghai Taxi driver as a seatbelt. What this did accomplish was being dropped off at random locations that were no where near where we wanted to be. This entailed quite a bit of street walking (see section on streets changing names). Oh, and not only do the names change but the numbers will sometimes overlap, whereby one building will have 2 sets of numbers and 2 street names. Welcome to China...

Thought that I was getting good at this Vegan thing until...

It is very daunting going into a restaurant and not being able to decipher anything on the menu. Especially with my diet. I was getting a bit cocky as I'd had a good run with meals (surprise, surprise) I normally point at dishes on the tables of other diners. I like this as it's not considered rude and you can cruise the tables and sus out the meals. I then accompany this with my rant:

"I am a vegetarian" - "I do not eat pork" (pork seems to come under another category) - "Do not cook with meat stock" - and "Make it free of animal produce". This is what I attempt to communicate via my phrase book before every meal.

So, there I was in Xian, I big trendy city. They have adverts in English (well Chinglish at least) and Chinese. They are the gateway to the Entombed Terracotta Warriors (aka mucho tourists), so I thought it may be easy to get my point across. They've fed a lot of whiteys.

I walk past a little restaurant which has many staff wearing matching uniforms. The Chinese use McDonalds as their aspiration for supreme food service. I open my Mandarin phrasebook and ask for rice - I'm told no. I look around and only see noodles on the tables. I ask for noodles. I'm told yes. I then choose 2 ingredients which I assumed would be cooked with the noodles - spinach and tofu. I then wait for my order. Firstly, came the biggest plate of spinach known to man. But it was beautiful. Cold but with sliced chillies and a sprinkling of sesame seeds. I gathered at this point that I would know be getting 3 separate meals. Next came the noodles, plain in a bowl. That's ok, I can mix them altogether myself. Then, like a throwback to a 70's birthday party came a strange mound - simialar to a meringue with a raspberry sauce. The smell was somewhat hideous - not at all like raspberry sauce. It was then I realised I was looking at the regional delicacy (as I'd read about it) ........ Tofu soaked in pigs blood.

Secondary De Ja Vu

The last time I had a De ja Vu /premonition was in India in '96. I opened the French door of my room in Udipur to acknowledge the morning as we had arrived here late the night before. The building's facade and surrounding landscape was familiar. I remembered this scene from a dream although the country was unknown. I also knew that if I was to walk to my left I would see particular buildings and a certain landscape. This happened in Xian.. I was trying to locate my hostel for the first time. I turned a corner. Suddenly I was struck with the imposing city wall on a slight angle and immediately knew what I would see when I reached the guesthouse. And I did. Martin advised that this indicates that I am in the correct place at the correct time..